Valentines Day Memory

I have to ad this disclaimer in advance. I love my husband and remember, I DID brag on him in posting about our 7th Anniversary last monty. It's the little things that matter and mean the most in the long run. That being said...

He is just NOT the mushy, gushy guy. He isn't quite sure what to buy on they popular gifting occasions... Christmas, Birthday, Anniversary, and of course Valentines Day. I have learned in 7 years if you want something done right, you have to do it yourself. So aside from a hit and miss card someone reminds him to get card here and there, I take care of myself for those occasions. He leaves the decision to me and honestly, I get the best gifts this way. Over the years I've picked out for myself a new digital camera, a treadmill (something he would have known better than to pick out anyway lol), scrapbook organizing cubes system, jewelry, laptop, and a Wii... just to name a few things.

I have to thank our family Doctor for last year's Valentines card. Hubby had an appointment the day before Valentines Day last year. I go with him to these because A.) he won't tell him something he should, that's where I come in. B.) he can't remember all the things he WANTED to tell the doctor, and C.) he can't remember everything the doctor told HIM to share with me. Hubby is okay with my attendance. I think I only left the room one time on a Dr appointment. I mean, he didn't need ME making sure the urologist performed the prostate exam right, although I was invited by the Dr to stay if I wanted. Nah, there was a great "How to prevent recurring UTI's" article I didn't quite finish in the waiting area, thanks anyway.

I'm rambling aren't I?

So our family doctor (Dr John) is awesome, not only does he feed ME with compliments on all my visits and hubby's (like telling hubby it's good to see his daughter with him today lol), he REALLY listens. You never feel rushed or could even tell he has every exam room and a waiting room full of people to see him. Last year as Dr John finished up, and was shaking hubby's hand before headed out the exam room door, he looked him square in the eye and told him sternly, "Don't forget her tomorrow, you hear?" I had to stop at the super Kroger to get the new scripts filled and hubby said he needed to pick up a couple things while I waited in line at the pharmacy. I finished up and went in search of hubby. I looked in all the aisles I thought he might be in picking up some of his favs... steak at the meat counter, shrimp in the seafood section... no hubby. I walked by the card/gift section on my way to another place he could be and out of the corner of my eye, I saw him squatted down, pulling out cards, reading them and putting them back. He looked for just the right one. I walked on by quietly, not wanting to make a point of him doing what the doctor ordered.

The card was the most perfect one ever. The words were perfect and while there was no chocolates, jewelery or roses attached he expressed things that aren't said in quite that way, nearly enough for most of us. Things that I do for him, that seem taken for granted are pointed out in a wonderful way! And are reminders to me of the many things he does for me that most of my friends cannot say about the men in their lives. I've had the boyfriend who showered me with gifts, had roses delivered to me on a regular basis at my office and seemed like the perfect loving guy to everyone... but me. He never really gave me himself. Although I did find out he gave other women himself. So I remind myself of the material things I had and the things I didn't have and I wouldn't trade them off for nothing. So I'll tell Dr John on Tuesday when I go for my appointment (alone, hubby stays home) that I had the best Valentines Day ever!

 Here are a few hearts I made for some of the special people in my life. Make your own here.

 

  

  

 

Celebrating 7 Years Together!

Today my hubby and I celebrate 7 great years of marriage! We like any couple have had our "for better/for worse, for richer/for poorer, in sickness/in health" moments. But  the good FAR outweighs the bad. I'd do it all again. I didn't wait 10 years for him to let him get away from me. You can read about that 10-year wait  in my post "Our Story", I can't imagine life without him either. Oh I'd be lying if I said he didn't get on my nerves from time to time. Which reminds of a funny line a dear friend, said once (or maybe 2 or 3 times lol).

On one obviously frustrating day upon arriving at the office, she had remarked that she could have killed her husband dead and buried him under the house! She is the closest thing to a Proverbs 31 woman as I've ever seen but it was just one of those days, that we all have.

I do have to brag on my hubby a little though. He makes my coffee every morning, AND brings it to me. A morning person, I am NOT. So he let's me slowly "come around" while he's fixing coffee, then brings it to me in the living room. He even gets my vitamins out sometimes and hands them to me (unless I've beaten him to that while he's making coffee). When I come home from work, he has a bottle of water in the freezer for me, because he knows I like it very cold and icy. It's a small luxury for me since I don't drink pop (soda). On his "good days" (I'll have to tell you about the good and bad days another time) he does so much more too, cook, laundry, clean the bathroom (yes, scrubbing the toilet too!).

So here's to another 7++++++ years together!

Our Story

I've heard more times than I can count how fascinating "our story" is. I see people looking back at me with smiles of wonder on their faces as I tell how my husband and I got married. So I thought I'd start from that beginning here and share it with you. Each time I have the opportunity to share my story, I am reminded how very special this union is and what a gift I have been given.



The questions I get most times are quiet, puzzled looks when one part of a conversation reveals my son's age (18 now) and then a few sentences later, or in another conversation on another day, they hear me say we have been married for 6 years. Most people do not dare to ask the obvious question, "Is he your son's real father?" (except for Pastor George in the Hospice Dept at work, but then again he's an exception to all the rules =) I usually end up volunteering the information, followed by our story. Partly to save them the embarrassment of asking... and partly because I love to tell it. (I'll try to keep it brief.)



I met Tommy through a friend in 1989 when he was visiting his sister in Ohio. He visited her around Thanksgiving each year. It was love at first site for me. I'd never met anyone so sweet, kind, considerate, thoughtful, funny, and HANDSOME! We spent some time together while he was in town but it wasn't nearly enough for either of us. We spent hours each week talking by phone. Mailed letters and cards (I still have those.) He would even play his guitar and sing to me on the phone. I was IN LOVE! But long distance relationships are hard, with just a handful of face-to-face time together in a year. 


In that first short week we knew each other, we connected on a deeper level than either of us realized. But Tommy had been burned badly twice before and would not let himself risk that again. When he made a trip to Ohio in November, 1990, we spent some time together, sort of a 'goodbye', realizing that the odds were against us with such a great distance between us and his fears of the past. Two months later in January 1991, I found out I was pregnant. Fast forward.... 


Tommy and I did not get back together because of the baby. Adam was born in July 1991 and Tommy did the right thing in supporting his child. But he faithfully paid the state of Oklahoma, who in turn sent it to the state of Kentucky before it reached us. Because of this process, and the fact that he was living with someone who was controlling, manipulative and jealous (who did everything she could to hinder out contact with him), Tommy and I eventually lost contact. 



I never stopped loving Tommy and did not date anyone for 10 years... since saying goodbye to him in 1990. I focused on working and raising my son and for a while that was enough for me. In 2000 I decided I'd been alone too long and started dating again. I eventually became engaged. I thought I had it all planned out. I was wrong.


When I met Tommy he was a single father raising his two daughters, Traci and Mandy. The youngest, Mandy, was a daddy's girl and the cutest little freckled-faced, red haired thing you ever saw. She and I both were equally heartbroken when I had to say goodbye to her too. It was her that found us in March 2001. She was about to be married herself and wanted to reconnect with me (so that I could be a part of her happiness) and she also wanted to meet her little brother she'd only seen pictures of and talked to briefly on the phone with a few years before. 


After Mandy pulled the family back together, and Adam and I went to Oklahoma to see his dad and 2 sisters I knew immediately that I still loved him. I had to do some thinking and make the decision to break off my engagement because I knew Tommy was still the love of my life. We continued visiting as often as possible and Tommy and I renewed our relationship with each other. We married in January 2003 and I know it was 'meant to be'. After so many years apart, and neither of us marrying other people, I believe we were meant for each other... soul mates. And I thank God for His plan. Sometimes you don't understand why things happen the way they do. And it could take days, months, or as in our case years to see the plan that God had.